The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck - Mark Manson

I recently decided to have another go at this book - using a different medium. Unlike the ebook I purchased years ago and never completed, the audiobook was engrossing. I even picked up a few takeaways. In this post, I will list three of them.

Doing Less Wrong

Society and culture are constantly iterating on the values it holds. Growth and progression are often marked by an end state. Unfortunately, that end state is perfection - which is never achievable because that standard is always moving towards infinity. Instead, we should measure growth in how well we have improved - how far we have come rather than how far we have yet to go.

Growth is an endlessly iterative process. When we learn something new, we don't go from "wrong" to "right." Rather, we go from wrong to slightly less wrong. And when we learn something additional, we go from slightly less wrong to slightly less wrong than that, and then to even less wrong than that, and so on. We are always in the process of approaching truth and perfection without actually ever reaching truth or perfection.

Do Something

The author presents inspiration, motivation, and action as an endless loop. It is necessary to realize that there is no starting point in this loop. Action does not need to be driven by motivation. The mere act of taking action can often trigger inspiration.

Don't just sit there. Do something. The answers will follow.

Dr. Jordan B Peterson describes something similar in one of his lectures - he talks about just starting something even if you are doing it badly. You will learn something about yourself and be able to know more about where you would like to be. It is tough to gain such insight without trying something first.

Thinking in terms of pain

It is easy to set lofty goals when posed with the question - What do you want out of life? Attaining our goals usually involves a certain amount of struggle or pain. Our failure at goals often arises due to our unwillingness to persist through that toil. 

The author suggests reframing our original question: What pain are you willing to deal with? This intriguing yet straightforward question will help filter our goals to those with the most promise.

A more interesting question, a question that most people never consider, is, "What pain do you want in your life? What are you willing to struggle for?" Because that seems to be a greater determinant of how our lives turn out.